Friday, March 4, 2011

Obligatory Blog

While this is not a photo of me, it is representative of how I have felt this week. Which explains why I haven't blogged.... at all. Which has increased my level of anxiety... which hasn't helped me one bit. It's not that I have writer's block. I don't. I simply have a head swimming full of thoughts and ideas and fears that are quite honestly uncomplimentary. OK, they're ugly. Consuming and ugly and out of control thoughts. Just being honest here folks. Inside my head are things I never thought I'd think. Fears that I thought I had conquered. Imagined pain that actually paralyzes me. All of which I know will come spewing out if I allow my fingers to touch a keyboard. (Despite the obvious fact that I am at a keyboard right now - and yet...)

Funny, I'm writing about writing about what I don't want to write about.

Oh, it's not easy being me.

So despite the fact I've avoided Facebook and Twitter and certainly blogging for well over a week, I must nevertheless write. I must work on my Practical Parenting column that is due first thing Monday morning. I loathe working on it. I am at school this morning, working in my breezeway/nurse's office with vomit-ey and head lice infested kids. Suffice it to say I sound unsympathetic towards their problems. I'm not really, it's just that I can't flipping think straight with so many distractions. So I moved down to my classroom.
If you could see me now, crouched at a children's computer desk, my hands on my knees supporting my fingers on the keyboard. Ever seen Will Ferrell in the movie Elf? Yeah, it's kinda like that but without the candy canes and Christmas cheer. I wonder if I can sneak out of here and find that nice, new quiet coffee shop in town.....

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